I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
