Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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