this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
