Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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