i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Randomize