a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
