awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
