Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
