So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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