question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
