Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.

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(228): View more from Mississippi

She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her

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(607): View more from New York

Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles

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(901): View more from Tennessee

He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles

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(323): View more from California

Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.

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(914): View more from New York

Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.

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(613): View more from Ontario

I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.

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