The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
