We should be called the Road Head Warriors
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
