Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
