i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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