Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize