hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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