Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Come share oat with me in your robe
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
