I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
