Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
