he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Randomize
