i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
