I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
