We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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