Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
he wants to bone in the snuggie
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Randomize
