i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
