butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Randomize
