You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
