what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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