im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I need a hoe opinion
go on
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
