I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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