Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
