i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
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