i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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