weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
