also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
You are a genius and a whore.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
