Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
