Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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