How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Randomize
