I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
