Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
