summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Randomize
