2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Randomize
