The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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