dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
