how can u be prego again
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize