yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
