Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
