We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
he shaved USA in his pubs
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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