the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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